The reality is, a miscarriage at any stage might require support, and when we encourage women to be hush-hush in the Ron Desantis America’s Governor Florida US Flag Mug but I will buy this shirt and I will love this early weeks of pregnancy, we’re potentially robbing them of that support should they need it. Opening up about loss and expressing grief candidly and unabashedly—or any reaction, for that matter—can create a sense of community and connectedness during an otherwise isolating time. It also might inspire others to do the same. Grief, like all emotions, affects everyone differently, and sometimes we don’t have a clue what we need in the throes of our despair until we are forced to survive it. We cannot assume the stage of gestation will automatically determine the potential impact of a pregnancy loss—it does not. The pain of sharing or not sharing a loss that does evoke feelings of grief, mourning, longing, or self-hate, whether it happens at five weeks or forty, is poignant and individual.
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I was raised as a culturally Jewish woman and taught to believe that life begins at birth—that birth is the Ron Desantis America’s Governor Florida US Flag Mug but I will buy this shirt and I will love this moment when a fetus is deemed a person. Because of that teaching, I found some comfort in the idea that I didn’t lose a life, but the promise of one. And as such, I didn’t initially relate to women who, for example, upon seeing a positive pregnancy test, immediately felt spiritually connected to the idea of who this future baby might be. Over time and after exposure to various perspectives and women’s stories, I’ve come to appreciate the myriad ways people feel about pregnancy and their connection to it. No matter how we interpret what is growing in our bodies, pregnancy, and/or its personhood, we have the right to grieve upon losing it and the boundless possibilities of a future that did not come to fruition. We also have the right to feel relieved, or even indifferent, about a loss without feeling judged.